Hey you.. 2

Hey you,

Today we texted about how I forget to send my message as my answer to you and that school is literally killing us..
I told you that I am gonna meet one of my other best friends tomorrow, since I haven't seen her in forever. I am so glad you take that so well.. if you know what I mean haha.

But then.. this sad feeling had blown me away..
You know I have 4 best friends right? You (duhhhhh), Gills, Men & well Sevalda..

I have to admit.. Seval hasn't been texting me in forever.

Okay let me start from the beginning..
When I was 13 I became depressed and developed an eating disorder.. People were bullying me and I was not happy with myself. That is when I started to visit the website for anorexic persons and I started to talk with other people about how less we ate and what our weight and goal was etc..
Everyone changed their numbers for groupchats & we also gave our PIN (blackberry messenger).

That is where I met Mendy and via Mendy I met Sevalda. She lived very closely to me, so we started talking and talked about meeting etc.
So we met and we had much more meetings in the 3 years she lived closely to me.. but then her boyfriend broke up with her and she started dating someone else..
She knew him from work, but because he also broke up with his girlfriend, he moved back to his hometown city which is near Amsterdam..
They started dating and it became serious.. that is where I lost her..

Nowadays she's living with him in his hometown which is 3 hours aways by train and bus for me..
In the beginning we talked a lot and tried to meet as much as possible (also including Mendy because we all became friends)
But well she moved definitely out and started living 24/7 with him.. that was a big change.. because in the beginning she lived like 20 minutes away from me and now 3 hours..
Okay so I do not know what I am typing btw I am just spitting out my thoughts. Sorry that's a mess haha. you love meh.

Well okay that was not the worse but after a while she stopped starting conversations (with me and Mendy as well). She also did not reply in the groupschat where the three of us were in.
Also we tried to meet again, but she did not have time anymore.. well okay I can imagine when you live together with your partner and you work it can be a lot sometimes.. but I make time for my friends you know..
Then I saw she was with other friends and that hurted.. and that went on everytime we asked to meet etc.

The last time we met was last year (2016) in the summer. Mendy and I went to Sevalda and well I could feel she was not the same towards us..
And I know I should not take is personally but it hurts you know.. she now is like a stranger to me.. I do not know her anymore..

It hurts.. losing someone you used to be so close to..
It hurts.. she does not talk anymore..

The last time I texted her I told her 'Miss u' because I tought maybe she would get that I feel sad about not talking a lot anymore because she is 'busy' (but in the meantime she is just hanging out with other friends and I saw her online very often yk).. but the only response I got was: 'yeah we did not talk in a while'.. well okay.. Even with my birthday 3 weeks ago she only texted me 'happy birthday'. auwghts..

Well I do not know what to say anymore, only that it really hurts me.. I will explain you more when we meet next time, because I know we will not stop talking and meeting with each other and we have to meet very soon (before I go to Valencia for school)

Well okay this is all I wanted to tell I guess..
I am sorry for all my pointless drama..

Love you

x