Felicita
Felicita
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Voornaam:
Maelee
Status:
Woonplaats:
Another universe
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26
Hobby's:
-
Website:
-
Vorige namen:
lijst
Roman-Catholic - Feminist - Friend - Hipster - Dreamer - Gymnast - Book Lover - Singer - All or Nothing
She was too quiet
or she was too loud
She took things too seriously
or not seriously at all
She was too sensitive
or too cold-hearted
She hated with every fibre of her being
or loved with every piece of her heart
There was no in-between for her, it was eiter all or nothing
She wanted everything but settled for nothing
You don't ever really let go. though. You don't stop. You don't stop hurting, you don't stop loving. It doesn't go away, you just keep living and eventually things get pushed into the background of your life, so it's not consuming you every day. And then one day you know you're okay. It still hurts. You still miss her. And yeah, you forget the details. The way she smelled, the way she laughed, how her skin felt, the sound of her voice. It's almost like a different life, a different person that loved her, was with her. But on day-to-day level, you know you're okay. Sort of.
Makes sure you won't ever regret things you haven't done. You never know what might happen...
She was too quiet
or she was too loud
She took things too seriously
or not seriously at all
She was too sensitive
or too cold-hearted
She hated with every fibre of her being
or loved with every piece of her heart
There was no in-between for her, it was eiter all or nothing
She wanted everything but settled for nothing
Dear you,
I hate days like today,
when every single thing I see
reminds me of you.
I hate days like today,
when every single song I hear
somehow relates to you.
I hate days like today,
when every single person I meet
somehow looks like you.
I hate days like today,
when every single thing I do
makes me realise how much I miss you.
I hate days like today,
when every single thing I see
reminds me of you.
I hate days like today,
when every single song I hear
somehow relates to you.
I hate days like today,
when every single person I meet
somehow looks like you.
I hate days like today,
when every single thing I do
makes me realise how much I miss you.
You don't ever really let go. though. You don't stop. You don't stop hurting, you don't stop loving. It doesn't go away, you just keep living and eventually things get pushed into the background of your life, so it's not consuming you every day. And then one day you know you're okay. It still hurts. You still miss her. And yeah, you forget the details. The way she smelled, the way she laughed, how her skin felt, the sound of her voice. It's almost like a different life, a different person that loved her, was with her. But on day-to-day level, you know you're okay. Sort of.
Makes sure you won't ever regret things you haven't done. You never know what might happen...
Invest in people who invest in you
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Gastenboek (577)
What I LIKE about school? Well, that's a tough question. I have to dig into my brain to say something useful. I think I only like the times at Greek and Latin with the girl from Kapel-Avezaath, when we can't stop laughing and the teacher is done with us and she wants one of us on one side of the classroom, and the other one on the other side. And then we still can't stop laughing. Those rare moments.
1 decennium geledenI'm not really sure what I want to be when I'm older. I've been thinking a lot about working at a newspaper or magazine, but I think I also would love to do more with English and have some great job abroad where you do something very useful for the world. I've also been thinking about going to Africa or other poor countries in the world to help the people and let them have a better future. Improving their lives. The only thing I'm sure of is that I want to do something international and important.
The person I can't live without.... I don't know. That's pathetic, to not know that. I've been feeling so alone lately, and somehow it feels not good to say it would be you, or Niallerslove, or Peperoni. No offence. You do mean a lot to me. More than other people around me. But it's sounds not good to say I can't live without someone I have never seen, and I only know through internet. I hope you do not feel sad about this when I say this. I'm grateful for having you. Really.
And then I think about my mom, but she doesn't understand me, and somehow has no idea what's going on with me. And I know it's hard, and I know I am hard, but still.
You know what the thing is? Lately I have been feeling so irritated every time someone here says something negative to me, and somehow I feel like those times appear much more than they should. I feel like they do it all on purpose. And the fact they don't know what's going on with me, not only because I don't show, -but because they don't ask, aren't interested, don't want to know- that's what's making me feel so lonely. It's just me. And I don't need those people. They don't show they need me. So I would probably not need them. Being away from them feels awesome, and those two weeks in the US proved that I didn't miss a single one of them. I wanted to stay there. Alone. An adventure. I feel like I don't need them and I grew away from everybody.
I'm sorry for the amount of text every time. I just type, and then it suddenly is quite a bit too much
Favourite disney film?
Do you know any musician/band/whatever who I probably don't know, but I should know?
What part of your body do you like most?
The last lie I told -or so it's the last one I can remember when I think about it- was yesterday evening, or last night. It was to that guy I just told you about. He asked me how I was. I told him I was perfectly fine although I could barely see what I was doing because of tears. He believed me. They always do. I don't even bother to say I'm not good. They don't even care, so why should I?
1 decennium geledenIf I could switch with someone for a day I would love to be Demi Lovato, or Blake Lively on the set of Gossip Girl, or Troian Bellisario on the set of Pretty Little Liars. Demi Lovato because she's the strongest celebrity I've ever seen and I really would like to feel how she gets to make all these fans incredibly happy and gets close to them, and of course she sings amazing, I'm proud of her. Blake Lively on Gossip Girl for the clothes and the amazing person she plays. And Troian Bellisario on Pretty Little Liars because she's the smart one who knows everything, who sees everything and who solves the problems. She rulessssss.
My favourite colour may be fuchsia, or red, or light blue.
The song you are currently listening to, or if you don't, the last song you heard?
Do you sleep on your back, or stomach, or side?
Have you ever harmed yourself on purpose?
My biggest fear is to end up in oblivion. Unnoticed. Unimportant. Nothing. Ending up alone.
1 decennium geledenIf you'd give me a knife or a razor I would cut. But not in front of you, and not on my wrist. I'd sneak into my room, hold it, think, have endless battles in my head and then push all the thoughts away and slid it against my skin, quickly. Then stop, watch the blood coming up, think how crazy I am, but at the same time enjoying the fact I can do something to myself I am scared of, then thinking how pathetic it is to enjoy seeing blood you created yourself, then being proud of the be able to bear the pain and proud of being able to do this, then regretting it all and thinking endlessly about how to hide it. Then hiding the knife or razor.
It's pathetic. I don't know why I write this.
Who is the most important person in your life? What that has happened in your life has had the most impact on you? What colour are the socks you're wearing at this very moment?
Awh, dankjewel! x
1 decennium geledenMy favourite food is the spaghetti with salmon from my mom, and chocolate
There's this guy I used to talk to, and he suddenly told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore before the summer started. I was really angry with him, and when he tried to talk to me again some time later I ignored. Yesterday evening I started to talk to him and made him feel better than he had felt in four months. I was glad I did something good. Nobody wanted to talk with him about what was going on with him, and I thought yesterday, let him go tell everything he wants. So I did and made him finally feel better. He said he didn't feel that calm and good since four months. He still doesn't listen to me, but I did something good 
1 decennium geledenI have never been in love. Never had a boyfriend.
I like a lot of fruit, but I definitely not like 'kruisbessen'. They're disgusting.
Tell me something a lot of people don't know from you. What does your perfect boyfriend look like? Is there someone around you you can tell your biggest fears and emotions to?
Oh, I forgot to tell I did something good last night