I'd like u to just not exist but that feels mean so I'd like to not exist for a while
traumaresponsesarenotoverreactingtraumaresponsesarenotoverreactingtraumaresponsesarenotoverreactingbutistillfeellikeimoverreacting
the bad thoughts are closing in again and i don't want them here but i have zero defenses to keep them out and i feel like i'm fourteen again and like i just want to disappear through a hole in the ground and like everybody is silently judging me but i know they aren't so i feel mean for assuming they are and it's all spiraling and i hate it and i don't wanna be fourteen again because i came so far but it doesn't seem to matter that i came so far, like it was all for nothing because i'm fourteen again and i want to not exist and not be here and not bother other people because i feel like a bother (but i'm not because i do so many things that actually don't suck and i'm trying to get better) because my emotions are too much and fourteen year-old me was too much and i'm fourteen again
and i should take a toilet break to go cry
[ bericht aangepast op 28 feb 2024 - 11:36 ]
help