4 × Retrieved

The days that followed were all the same: Jurien would summon me to the Great room, where the four of us had lunch or dinner. Here, he taunted us with words, and so I usually kept quiet and focussed on my meal. You’d never know when would be your last after all.
      When he’d grown bored of tormenting the other fae, he’d take me on some kind of activity. I soon noticed that all of them required lots of energy. On the first day, he dragged me through the castle and made me dust the endless amount of paintings on each floor. But carrying the cleaning tools up the steep, narrow stairway was wat truly tired me, and my breathing would be ragged every time we got to the top. The days after that he gave me similar, silly tasks, and every night I would fall face first on my matrass, instantly asleep. I would barely have any energy left to wash myself or take off my foul clothes. Cresseida had been right about the reason I was here. Sometimes Jurien would ask me oddly formulated questions, or snarl at me that if I was tired he would be better of killing me already. He always made it sound like he did not care, but I heard the faint curiosity. It was all a game for him, to find out how far he could go before I’d collapse. How long I’d last before I would die.
      I never showed him how exhausted I really was, just to taunt him for once. I knew it annoyed him that I did not budge under the pressure, and it felt like a small victory for me. But I felt my energy faint more and more every day, and I didn’t know how much longer I would be able to put on a show.

Today I felt even worse than the days before. My muscles were aching and I could barely keep my eyes open. Lucky for me, we weren’t going upstairs. Instead, we descended into darkness. Jurien strode before me with a torch in his hand and I tried my best not to trip, leaning on the cold, stone walls for comfort.
      “Where are you taking me?” This place felt wrong, and that feeling increased with every further step.
      Jurien didn’t answer, and I knew better than to ask again. As he had said the first day: his patience has limits, and I did not feel like infringing those again.
      While the vibe in the castle above the ground was unpleasant, it felt even worse beneath. The goose bumps on my arms seemed to be permanent now, and the air was cold and frigid. I had a faint suspicion of what this place was.
      We had hit the bottom and now paced through a narrow corridor. I had to bend over in order not to hit my head at the low ceiling. Our steps echoed through the darkness, and I tried to focus more on the sound of our feed stepping into puddles of water, whether than our destination.
      Finally, there was a door at the end of the hall. Jurien stopped and reached for a key in his pocket to unlock the door. Without warning, he threw it open.
      Left and right were endless amounts of cells hewn into the walls. It seemed even darker in here than the hallway before, and it reeked. The smell of unwashed bodies and feces overwhelmed me. I was an effort to swallow down the bile in my throat.
      “Come, Reign.” Jurien stepped through the door, and gestured for me to follow him. I hesitated, but crossed the doorstep and followed our only source of light. To my right, a prisoner sat close enough to the bars that I could see his face in the flickering light of Juriens torch. It was covered in cuts and bruises, but there was one thing that shocked me more.
      He was human.
      “Why are we here.” I didn’t dare speak to loudly in this place, afraid of what else lured behind the bars.
      Jurien chuckled. It was a low, evil sound. “Because we’re going to have some fun.”
      Behind the next door stood a large, stone table in the centre of the room. On the walls hang various kinds of blades. There were also three doors.
      “Pick one,” Jurien demanded.
      I shook my head. “What’s behind it?”
      “Pick one.”
      Carefully, I walked towards the door in the middle; door number two. I laid my hand on the handle and jumped back when I felt something crash against the door. “What is it?” I asked again, my voice trembling a bit.
      Jurien grinned and pushed me aside. He yanked the door open and revealed what lay behind.
      A human man sat crouched in the corner. He was more bones than skin, and looked like he had not seen a bath in years. His hollow eyes were filled with fear when he beheld us in the doorway. “Please,” he whimpered, “I’ll- I’ll do anything! But please…”
      Jurien grabbed him by the collar of his filthy shirt and dragged him out of his small cell. The man struggled and cried, but Jurien lifted him up the table with his immortal strength. I expected him to tie the man to table with ropes, but realized that he held him down with his powers.
      “What are you doing,” I said as panic started to rush through me, “Let him go.”
      The faerie ignored me and opened a closet, where even more tools for torture lay displayed. My mouth run dry at the sight of it. He wouldn’t just cut him open right in front of me, right?
      Jurien picked a knife the size of my fore arm and stepped back towards the table. “Cresseida brought him to me a month before you arrived.” He looked at the man like he was nothing but a prey. He turned to me. “This is where I put them when I get tired of them, to have…another sort of fun.” He laughed at that last part.
      He was mad – I knew because of the way he spoke, the way he behaved around us. I took a step back, away from the monster in the room. He laughed at the sight of it. “I need you here Reign,” he said as he held out the knife to me.
      I stared at him; eyes wide and my mouth open in awe. He couldn’t possibly mean for me to…
      But the wicked smile that lingered around Juriens lips told me otherwise. Invisible hands pushed me forward, and I bumped into the stone table. Suddenly, the knife was pushed into my right hand. I screamed and tried to open my hand and let the knife go, but the muscles in my fingers didn’t obey. The man on the table still cried, and begged me not to do it – pleaded me to stop and have mercy.
      Jurien knew no mercy.
      He also controlled my whole arm now, and I tried to move it elsewhere than the man on the table with my free arm. It did not budge.
      The blade now hovered over the man’s belly. Jurien slid his shirt up, revealing a scarred stomach with still healing wounds. “Please,” the man cried, his eyes filled with terror directed at me, “I have a son.”
      Jurien chuckled. “Are you sure you don’t want to do it yourself, Reign?” he asked. He shook his head when I didn’t reply. “A pity, but not less fun.”
      The knife lowered, now mere inches away from the skin. The man panicked, frantically trying to back away from the sharp object. He failed.
      A silent tear slid down my own cheek, and I swallowed down the nausea. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, and closed my eyes as the screaming began.

Jurien personally escorted me back to my room, and I slammed the door shut behind me. I wanted to collapse on the floor, but instead I forced legs to drag me to the bathroom. One by one, I peeled my clothes off me, leaving them in a bloody pile on the floor. I stepped into the still empty bathtub and opened the tab. A chill went down my spine as I waited for the water to surround me like a warm hug.
      My hands were still shaking when I raised them above the water. Not because of the cold, but because of the things Jurien made them do. There was still dried blood stuck underneath my nails.
      I wrapped my arms around my knees in an attempt to calm myself down. But it didn’t work, and my breathing was ragged. I watched the water slowly turn into a faint red, and tried not to scream when I realised that I was bathing in another man’s blood.
      When the water had long gone cold, my fear and sadness made place for something else: anger. I’m mad, no, I’m furious. My blood is boiling and my eyes are flaming with rage. Because of the things he made me do under his command. Because an innocent man died today. Because I can’t stop imagining his wife and son, waiting by the window for their father and husband to return home.
      I stepped out of the bathtub and didn’t bother to dry my skin with one of the soft towels. I buried myself in the blankets of the bed let my tears soak my pillow until I fell asleep.
      I dreamed of dark rooms with red curtains. It is not the man, but me who lies on the cold, stone table. Cresseida and Aeryn stand in the corner of the room, looking at me with pity and disgust. Juriens mad laugh bellows through the room, but he is nowhere to be seen. My mother stands beside me and shakes her head. “You abandoned us,” she says with that familiar disappointment. I look to the other side and see Lucia, who consists of more bone than skin. “I’m hungry,” she says and ribs my chest open with her bony fingers.
      I found Cressseida standing next to me when I opened my eyes. I had just enough time to roll on my side before I hurled my guts up on the carpet. Her eyes narrowed when a bit landed on her leather boots, but she kept quiet. When I found myself steady enough to sit up, I met with her black eyes. Eventually, she nodded in understanding.
      Jurien must die.

For once, I was not afraid when the faeries escorted me to the Great Room for dinner. No, this time, my pace was steady, and I held my head up high. This time, I would not fear Jurien, our let his taunting words bring me down. I was no longer the scared little prey they presumed me to be. The things that Jurien had made me do had opened my eyes, and raw anger boiled inside of me. Every step forward was in honour of the innocent people who died in this castle by his hand. My next move was for the men and women who would never be united with their families again. Because I was the predator now, and I would let him pay.
      To my surprise, my confidence and steadfastness did not fall apart with the look Jurien send me. He was hungry for power, and I would not do the pleasure of giving it to him.
      His mask crumbled slightly as I grinned at him. No longer would he be able to taunt me.
      “Leave him,” Jurien snarled across the room to the fae beside me. They let go of my arms without questioning him and left through the still open doors. My arms fell flat against my side, and I used the opportunity to tuck my hands in my pockets, untroubled of the danger sitting at the dining table.
      “Sit,” he said. The immortal grace surrounded him. Everyone else would see a powerful king sitting in that seat. But I knew better.
      Slowly, I strolled towards my usual seat next to Aeryn, who slightly shook her head in a warning. Don’t do this, she seemed to want to say. I moved my lazy grin from her, to Cresseida. She stared at me, cautiously calculating my next move. I winked at her and sat down.
      Beside Aeryn, Jurien still carefully watched me. If he was bothered by my new regained confidence, he did not show it. His raven eyes slid over me, analysing every detail. Every fold, every wrinkle in my clothing did not go unnoticed. The high collar of my jacket brushed against my check, and a shiver went down my spine.
      “You seem rather...cheerful,” Jurien said, sending an evil smile along, “Perhaps we should continue with today’s activities tomorrow.” He smiled at the fae beside him, who wisely kept their mouth shut and stared at the table instead. “I must say that Reign did a marvellous job today, and he seemed to enjoy himself quite well.”
      Flames of anger enlightened inside of me, ready to erupt into a catastrophic storm of rage. But I released a breath, willing the flames to cool down to a low, burning fire. I needed the fire to remember me of my goal, and not let it swallow me whole.
      I looked up at Jurien, green eyes met darkness, and I grinned. “You can do all you like, Majesty.”
      He clenched his fists, bending the cutlery inside it. He either didn’t notice or didn’t care.
      I slightly leaned into the table, hands flat on the wood. “You see, Jurien,” I continued before he could reply, “I don’t care about you, or your plans for me. Because you know what; I’m not the pathetic one – you are.” I spat the words down the table and exhaled, my body shaking from the sudden adrenaline rushing through my veins.
      Jurien gracefully watched me from the head of the table.
      And then he exploded.
      Good, I thought as invisible hands launched me through the air, work that temper.
      I collided with the cold, stone floor mere seconds later, and the sound echoed through the Great room. My bones heavily protested with the smack, but I gritted my teeth. I would not show weakness.
      I raised on my hands and knees, and glanced in the direction I came from. Cresseida and Aeryn had both jumped up, but made no movement in my direction. Jurien, on the other hand, was rushing towards me. Every step he took seemed amplified by his power. He didn’t look like a king – he looked like a conqueror. And now he would conquer me.
      The hands grabbed my collar before he even reached me. They threw me backwards through the room and smacked me against the wall. All air was sucked out of me and I gasped for air as I slid back down to the floor. I caught Cresseida’s glance in the movement. Do it now, she seemed to want to say with her worried frown, hurry.
      Not yet, I tried to send back.
      Jurien hurled me back and forth through the room with his power while screaming like a madman. How dared I speak to him like that? How dared a miserable human like me behave in such a disrespectable way at a king. I snorted. “You’re not a king.”
      The familiar hands had been on and off my throat since then. My right arm was pounding, and blood slid down my sleeve. I made no space for thoughts about potentially broken bones. Instead, I focussed on Jurien’s movements. He seemed to have lost all sanity.
      A painful smile appeared at the realisation: everything went just as planned.
      Except for óne thing.
      Jurien paced through the room, following wherever his power willed me to. Several times he hurled me on a table of the fae at the side. They didn’t help me, but just scattered away. I clenched my fists; these powerful fae are all cowards.
      But now I was done being thrown through the room like a plaything. A cracked laugh escaped my mouth. “You say you are such a mighty king,” I spat at him, drops of blood flying along, “But a true king wouldn’t hide behind his power. What’s the matter Jurien? Are you to scared to touch a mere human like me?” I shook my head, and gathered whatever strength was left in me to raise on my knees for the last blow. “You’re more pathetic than I’ll ever be.”
      Jurien roared, fangs exposed, as he leaped for me.
      Everything happened so slowly.
      I reached up, and my bad arm screamed as I slid the hidden dagger out of my collar. I willed all my muscles to work one last time, as I slung my arm back and hurled the dagger towards Juriens throat.
      Aeryns agonizing scream was the last I heard before my energy faded completely, and I blacked out on the floor.