The days of our lives

I think he noticed me staring at him him but he didn’t stop me so I guess he didn’t care.
I’ve known this boy for a long time, perhaps all my life. But I had never viewed him the the way I did now, that must’ve started about a year ago.
I’m in love with him. With his being, his eyes, his words, his smile and his mind.
He’s like an addiction to me, and I’m hooked on him, I’m waiting for him to completely take me over, to envelop me with his being and to give me the high I’m craving. I’m not sure how much of this I can handle, or how long.
I hate him. But I love him so much.
One day he’ll know, one day he’ll see, one day he’ll break down my walls and slip into my subconscious. And he won’t leave. And I love him for that.